Gonzo’s Antics – Memories of One Cool Cat | Part V: The Habitual Hairdresser

Gonzo Cat Antics
Here’s Gonzo, playfully attacking my head. (2001 or 2002)

March 17, 2019

Author: Melissa Sitzman

Part V:

The Habitual Hairdresser


Gonzo had a weird obsession, with people’s hair. So much so, that he usually slept on my pillow. He would curl up, around my head, while purring and “making biscuits” in my hair. Because kittens knead their mothers while they’re nursing, I imagine that my hair reminded Gonzo of his cat mom. Other than the few times that I woke up with cat drool in my ear, it didn’t bother me. In fact, it helped me fall asleep! Other people weren’t so amused.

My ex husband and I, often had friends over on the weekend to play cards, watch sporting events on television and just have a good time. It wasn’t unusual for a friend to spend the night. I didn’t mind because we had a guest bedroom and a big, comfortable couch. I remember one night, in particular. When a good friend named Jeff, stayed on our couch.
It was late and I had to work in the morning so, I gave Jeff a blanket and pillow and headed to bed. About ten minutes after laying down I hear Jeff calling out to me, “Melissa…. Melissa! Can you come get Gonzo?”

“Yeah, I’m coming.”I answered, wondering what Gonzo was up to. I reluctantly got out of bed and went into the living room. There, I saw Gonzo, literally, laying on top of Jeff’s head! “Help,”was all he could manage to say, with a twenty pound black cat, perched on his noggin. I tried not to laugh but, did, as I picked Gonzo up.

I apologized to Jeff and carried Gonzo to my bedroom. I got Gonzo to lay down and so did I. I had just starting to fall asleep, when I hear Jeff, again. Only, this time, I can’t make out what he’s saying! I get up and rush to the living room and there’s Jeff with his pillow, covering his head. Gonzo was standing on top of it, trying to get at his hair. “Gonzo, no,”I exclaimed as I swooped him up. This time I made sure he fell asleep before I did.

The next morning, Jeff was sitting at the dining room table when I got up. He looked like a wreck! His eyes were blood shot and his hair was a complete mess. “Are you ok? Why are you up already?” I asked. Jeff shoots me a sarcastic smile and says, “I’m up because I couldn’t sleep! I was too busy trying to hide my hair from your cat, all night long! I finally gave up at about 5 o’clock this morning. I think I slept for about 2 hours.”

I tried really hard to contain my laughter but, couldn’t help it. I don’t know if it was due to lack of sleep but, Jeff started laughing, too! Then Jeff proceeded to tell me how he attempted to deter Gonzo, in every way possible. He said he tried using his pillow, tried putting his head under the covers, etc. but, nothing worked. He ended up falling asleep with Gonzo purring, while giving him a new hairdo!

Gonzo didn’t stop there, either, he did the same thing to just about anyone, that ever spent the night. It’s amazing we had any friends left!

Gonzo 3 – Humans 0
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